Fake World you Murdered Me !!!

World,

I believed you but now I see your fake face smiling at me....

Today I regret for the decision I took in my life.... I'm not worrying that the decision I took would spoil me but the reason why I took that decision no more prevails :(

Now, the meaning behind the decision I took had vanished and I'm left alone again with the same blame on me.... I'm sailing in the same boat with no change in the sailing though I have taken the route you people insisted me to...

The wind blow is the same, the rowing is same and the boat is also the same but the sailors have changed.... Still no change in sailing....

Now people!!!!!!!!!!! Tell me why you insisted me to change the direction I took?

You have no reasons to tell me and you remain silent..no support from you too .... Then why the hell did you ask me to take the route that now I'm sailing through?

It was you who insisted me, rather compelled me and now you show your fake face again!

Enough !!!

Cant bear it anymore....

Thanks for all stupid directions(you gave) I took just trusting your fake smiles..

Just to ensure that smile always stayed on your faces I took the medicine you gave and now I die of that silent poison!

Good Bye you Fake World!!!

I'm Dead..............................

I'm HIM

Today evening I was walking past the church road and unlike all days there was a very big crowd on the road...There were children with balloons, couples walking with smiling faces and there were the oldies who looked so happy... It was not Christmas but there was some celebration going on in the church...

I was missing him today badly :(

As I walked passed, there came out a couple walking...I could see some red balloons behind that man..Ha ha ha..He was having a couple of red balloons and was holding his hand behind..may be to avoid me seeing ;) Sometimes elders don't accept the kid in them and that is when these kind of hiding happens :) But there was one person in my life who whole heartily expressed the kid in him.... If he was here now, he would have held the balloons so high enjoying like a kid and would not have least bothered about the world around commenting....

I missed a childish friend who got me balloons whenever I wished one, least bothering about the fact I was 22 and he 27 added :) I miss you :((((((((

I walked little further... Again a couple walked by me...The man was wearing so colourful shirt and a jean like a young man though he was more than fifty...One look at his face, makes it clear he crossed fifty, years back.The lady with him was in a traditional silk saree.Though the saree was so bright and glittering, my eyes were on that man's shirt...There was a person who was fifty and who used to wear the same kind of colourful shirt with jean but there was a difference...His looks never revealed his age...

I missed the young smart person in my life who sometimes made me feel dressing up and attitude defines or affects ones personality.He looked just few years elder than me though he started his journey more than 2 decades since I started :) I miss you :(((((((((

I miss him very badly today..Not cos I was walking alone, not cos I was drowning in problems but because he is the ONLY person I have seen with the attitude that was always aligned with mine...

May be his attitude influenced and had overwritten mine :) .......Who knows...

But again there was a difference, me being a gal in this Indian society restricted me to open up like he did.

He is not my GOD, he is not my LOVE and he is not my LIFE

But,

I'm his BLOOD, I'm his LIFE and I'm HIM

I LOVE HIM....

He is my silent Inspiration,

He is my Strength,

And

He is my DAD...

I'm HIM !!!

New Born Love - Chapter Seven

" Dear .... ,

Due to some personal reasons, I wont be able to make it to office today and tomorrow. For

1. .....you can contact... "Ms.X"
2......you can contact... "Mr.Y"
3......you can contact... "Ms.Z"
I will be available over phone in case of emergency.
Regards,

Shadow "

Started the day with this piece of mail to my supervisors from my PC at home early in the morning. I got up and was getting ready to office ;) I intimated mom that I will be taking the second shift bus today. So, my mom and sister left home before I did. Then, after confirmation over call, I stepped outside our campus.

Should I say coincidence??? It was my sister who noticed it later in the evening that we both were in almost a matching color attire...

Our first target was a famous temple which I've been thinking to visit from the day I started going to college.As planned we executed it.. Smell of the agarbhathis and sandal.. people with fresh faces walking in a slow pace.. lamps were lit near the idols ... we both moved in and followed the general procedure in and then sat down on the floor just to get the feel of the Super Power.. Great time together....

We then stepped out... the lane outside temple now had ladies selling fresh Jasmine flowers.. Sometimes jasmine flowers tied almost as long as the length of the hair looks good ;) It was then I regretted for shortening my hair :(

We were then thinking what next.... as we moved on, we had my favourite straweberry milk shake :) There was then no other plans of roaming in the metropolitan city in hot sun...Our next target was dear sisters place :) Half a day left and unplanned time together :)

Silence,little chat about the things that happened in our lives,album sharing and again it was silence when we found some time together alone... It was lunch time then...My mom had prepared my favourite dishes and packed for my lunch.. Shared it with him together :) Later came in his (our) mom with her own special iems for us.. lunch was so heavy..could not deny when it was her love she served :)

Time passed by and I got call from home as always and then I realised simple lies in this relationship adds a special flavour ;)

Photo session which was the proof for this day remained in our hearts :) had to start home after spending some lovely time with his(our) family... Enquiries about my location and time I would reach home continuously added little tension and fear in that lovely situation but these little tensions made it memorable :)


He dropped me at my home and spent sometime with my family too :) had dinner together and left with a promise of making his presence at home the next day !!!

The next day was our officially granted time together :)))))))))))))))

Little secrets , little emotions, Little spice, little fragrance and little smiles made my day memorable :)